Motherhood is a journey full of ups and downs and although there is no magic formula for educating a child, our education, our beliefs and our training are fundamental to guiding them on the path to their own destiny.
A Psychogenealogical Guide for Mothers: How to Educate Your Children from a Profound and Conscious Perspective
However, we often find ourselves wondering who taught us to be mothers and what are rules to follow to raise our children in a healthy and conscious way.
In this sense, psychogenealogy offers a decalogue of the mother that can serve as a guide for all those women who wish to educate their children from a deeper and more conscious perspective.
The first point of the Decalogue invites mothers to recognize that their children are not an extension of themselves or their family tree but rather independent beings with their own life plans. By understanding this, mothers can free themselves from the burden of imposing their own desires and expectations on their children and can instead focus on supporting them on their path to personal fulfillment.
The second point suggests that mothers should give their children the freedom to choose their own name, without imposing on them a destiny or an emotional burden that could limit their ability to grow and develop fully.
The third point highlights the importance of raising children with love and affection, without losing the mother’s own identity and without falling into an addiction to sacrifice. The idea is that motherhood should not be seen as a sacrifice but as a responsibility that is assumed through freedom and choice.
The fourth point of the Decalogue talks about the importance of offering children tools to build their own lives but without imposing limits or rallies on them. In this sense, the best way to teach a child is through example, offering them a model of life-based on solid and coherent values and principles.
Fostering independence in parenting: The importance of respecting children’s individuality
One of the most important tasks of parenting is to promote the independence of children so that they can develop their personalities and grow as autonomous individuals.
In this sense, it is essential that parents allow their children to make their own decisions, to experiment and to make mistakes in order to learn from them.
This parenting approach, based on freedom and respect for the individuality of children, has been adopted by many modern parents who seek to educate their children in a more balanced and healthy way.
An example of this is a mother who has decided to have her son stop calling her “mom” whenever he wants, to start calling her by her own name. According to her, this will help break the bonds of dependency and balance the relationship between the two.
It also allows you to have a private and intimate space in the house that feels like your own territory. This shows clear respect for your child’s individuality, as well as their ability to make decisions and define themselves.
As for the choice of friends, career, leisure activities, etc., the mother states that she listens to her son, gives him her opinion, but does not select anything for him, neither prohibits or obliges him. This implies total respect for the autonomy of the child, who is the one who must decide what direction to take in his life.
Encouraging autonomous growth: The parenting approach based on freedom and respect for the individuality of the child
The mother also mentions the importance of letting her child make mistakes, as these are necessary for learning and growth. Understand that every failure is a change of path and that with them you grow every day; if you protect him too much, he will never be an adult.
This attitude of acceptance and respect for the child’s learning and growth process is crucial to encourage their development.
Finally, the mother points out that she will never define her child as “calm”, “nervous”, “shy”, etc., because she knows that children form their self-concept based on what their parents say about them.
Instead, it transmits to him that within him are all the possibilities of being, that it is all potential. This attitude of openness and confidence in your child’s potential is a sign of your respect for their individuality and for their ability to define themselves.
In short, the mother who has adopted this parenting approach based on freedom and respect for the individuality of her child demonstrates an open and sensitive attitude toward their development process.
By allowing your child to make their own choices, make mistakes, and define themselves, you’re giving them the tools needed to grow as autonomous and balanced individuals.
