The “Me message”: an effective tool for the expression of children’s feelings
The ability to express feelings effectively is crucial in life, especially for children. A useful technique to achieve this is known as the “Me message”. It consists of the child expressing how he feels, what has led him to feel that way and what changes he would like to see in his environment.
For example, a child might say, “I feel angry when you make fun of my glasses. I wish you wouldn’t do it anymore.” This strategy works best in structured and supervised situations, such as in a school classroom.
However, in less controlled situations, such as during recess or on the school bus, it can lead to more teasing if the bully perceives that the affected child is upset.
Despite this, it’s an important skill that children can learn to handle a variety of situations. To use the “Me message” children must learn to maintain eye contact, speak clearly and use a polite tone of voice.
In this way, they will be able to express their feelings effectively and, in turn, develop valuable communication skills for their future.
Visualization
Many children respond well to visualized words that “bounce back” at them. This gives them the image of not having to accept or believe what they are told. This image can be created by showing them how a ball bounces off a person.
Another effective visualization is for the child to pretend that he has a shield around him that helps to bounce back teasing and bad words. Once again, this technique gives children the message that they can reject these humiliations.
3 effective strategies for dealing with teasing and criticism
The “refocus” technique can change the perception of negative comments, transforming mockery into praise.
For example, when a child teases another child for wearing glasses, saying “Four eyes, four eyes, you have four eyes,” the affected child may respond in a decent way and thank the other for noticing their glasses.
This type of response leaves the one who mocks, especially when there is no reaction of anger or frustration. Another approach is to respond to the joke with a comment such as “It’s an excellent joke”.
Another useful strategy for handling mockery is to agree with the facts. If someone teases a child for having a lot of freckles, the child can simply accept the fact and say something like “Yes, I have a lot of freckles”.
The same thing applies when someone taunts a child by calling them a “whiner child”, simply accepting the criticism and saying “Yes, sometimes I cry easily”. This approach generally decreases the feeling of shame or the desire to hide something.
A simple but effective response to handling a taunt is to respond with a simple “And?” This response shows indifference to mockery and downplays it. Children find this response easy and effective. This technique is humorously represented in Bill Cosby’s book “The Worst Things to Say”.
Effective tips for dealing with teasing and bullying in children
When it comes to children who are victims of teasing, there are several strategies that can help manage the situation effectively.
According to experts in the field, one of the most effective ways is to respond with a compliment. Instead of allowing hurtful words to hurt, the child can respond with something positive to minimize the impact of teasing.
Another effective technique is to use humor to show that humiliation isn’t important. Laughter can turn a painful situation into a funny situation, reducing tension and helping to calm the situation.
In some cases, it may be necessary for the child to seek help from an adult if teasing persists. Parents, caregivers, teachers, social workers or counselors can help the child manage the situation and find solutions.
However, if teasing turns into harassment, more serious measures must be taken. Bullying is defined as hostile and repetitive behavior that aims to intimidate or harm another individual. In these cases, it’s important for adults to intervene to prevent the situation from worsening.
Parents and administrators should be alert to the possibility of harassment and take steps to stop it. In some cases, it may be necessary to involve authorities and parents to determine the best course of action to end bullying and protect the child from future similar situations.
